If Mow Had Magic

Dearest Chelsmow,

Recently I’ve been reading a lot of the book (The Wise Man’s Fear) when I wait for my silly roommate to get off work between my shift and hers. Ive hit some really weird points in the book admittedly, but am nonetheless happy that I’m only at 60% through and still have a long ways to go. Otherwise I’d have to start turning to all of my unread books on my shelf that will pale in comparison to the glory that is this series.

But one thing that I’m having a lot of fun with is recalling the things you would say about the book before I had ever laid my hands or eyes on it. It’s been fun trying to remember the assumptions I made from your comments in the beginning, like looking at old photographs and trying to figure out what I was thinking about. One comment of yours that stood out to me was when you said how (don’t mind my paraphrasing) the book made you sometimes wish that magic was real in the world. I’ve had a blast imagining what the world would be like with people calling the names of elements and using sympathy to do things. But it’s made me wonder what element you would think you’d be drawn to? I think mine would be water because water speaks to my little desert soul. It yearns for it even though it’s a powerful element I will never quite understand.

But if I DID understand it and have its true name, these are the ways in which I would use them in my daily life:

  • Remove water from a windshield during a storm.
  • Swish the water in my bladder some when it hurts to dislodge bacteria.
  • Ask it to moisturize my hair.
  • Be able to tell if water was drinkable or not.
  • Push things in water out of the way so I wouldn’t ever have to panic about it.
  • Master watercolor.

Chelso, what element do you think you’d be drawn to in the Kingkiller world? What real life applications would you do with it?

I miss you and all your Tesla vibes. Thank you for being a thumb hero. šŸ‘šŸ»I’m sending you good vibes wherever you are!

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#truthordare

imageDearest Chelso Mow,

I have been the literal worst. I can only hope you can find it in your heart to forgive this Mow in time. The punishment has not been forgotten! It will be paid. By this I swear.

Chelso, visiting you was incredible. It was the 2nd time in my life that I purchased plane tickets that did not involve family or an event that needed attended. It was done for joy and joy it delivered. That beach day was a day to remember! I also loved being able to see Chelsea in her natural environment, witness the stomping grounds with my own eyes. I also disagree with the lack of theme, because I felt there was a solid amount of off-beat. The Dairy was awesome and amusing. Goats! Horses! Possums! Your backyard mountains weren’t too shabby either. The weather was perfect, the cappuccinos your promised nearly did touch heaven themselves, and the pools to sneak into are exquisite. It was a great weekend you let me bombard on.

Also recently, I haven been chewing a lot of “5” gum, and it’s rather refreshing. One of my weird worries is the off chance that my breath smells bad and that I’m subjecting someone else to it. So I like to keep him around, and this recent gum has truth or dare questions on the individual wrappers. I decided that this post is going to be filled with riveting truths that I’ve collected over the past week. Partially because all of the dares involve Vine, Instagram and Twitter.

“Tweet on Twitter a time you’ve tested your limits.”

  • I do not use my Twitter really other than to troll, but I tested my limits one or two times attempting to stay up two days in a row during college finals.

“What do you never want your parents to find in your room?”

  • My ex broke my wall and my bed with his sheer amount of troll strength. I have hidden both from my mother.

“If you had no responsibilities, where would you be right now?”

  • Disneyland. Preferably with a Chelso that also had no responsibility.

“What was your worst fashion disaster as a kid?”

  • As you well know Chelsea, there was an anime/goth obsessed 8th grade version of myself back in the day. This version was bestowed only with the most marvelous mushroom bowl haircut.

“Do you have any piercings your parents don’t know about?”

  • no, this is a creepy question.

“How many times have you lied today? What was theĀ biggest one?”

  • I have not, I haven’t needed to.

“Where did you have the best night or your life? Repeat it.”

  • I couldn’t tell if this was a dare, but it said truth next to it. As long as stupid adventures or evenings are being spent with loved ones, than it belongs in the best pile.

“Have you ever been in love? How many times?”

  • Once, or twice. The rest were bizarre varieties of obsession.

“What’s the most annoying thing people do on planes?”

  • Take forever. Also smell bad.

“Have you ever been cheated on? Did you forgive them?”

  • Technically yes cheated on, and also technically no. But I gave them opportunity to make up for it.

“What’s the weirdest pickup line you’ve ever used?”

  • ‘Don’t make me lick your face.’ I’m not proud of it.

As you can tell, these questions are definitely created for our age group. Very important things were addressed. Kids are so weird these days. I adore you to death Chelsea and if you feel up to picking up a pack of “5” gum I would love to see your truths. I look forward to your post on Friday!!

“Can I look through your purse??”

Upon your request, I’m going to go through my purse today too! I loved your purse post Chelsea, it got me deep. I remember asking you this when I first met you because I loved watching what’s-in-your-purse videos online at the time. It’s like peering into someone’sĀ soul in a bizarre way. Your soul has a fork in it haha.

I’m also going to try to stay true to the reality and just give you the whole of what is stashed in my black hole. Normally I like to go through my purse once a week and get rid of the random garbage that finds its way in there. However, I’ve been traveling and have had no time or mind to do it so you get to see Maryanne’s travel purse state.

Let’s also start with the purse itself. This purse was yours at one point in time and you graced me with the opportunity to use it. It’s beautiful and I love it. It’s large and I can stuff most anything in it, and it has a glorious owl on the front that stares. I also washed in before I left home, so it’s all clean and ready to stare at the world.

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Inside this glorious purse the main event is my wallet as well. I do not love this wallet as much as you love yours. I bought it out of a need for a wallet with a zipper and I enjoy stripes and blue. However, I’ve been eager to replace it but have yet to find something more suitable for me. I took out all of the extra receipts and change that usually litter it – before the trip. So this is a poor representation of what it usually looks like. I kind of feel like I have cleaned my house and did my makeup before a guest came over and then casually pretended like that is what it is always like. No, this is a very very poor representation. Normally I can’t even zip my wallet back up without it snagging and ripping five or six shredded receipts.

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Next we have the heap of garbage that is in the middle of my purse.

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Starting on the left, we have my usual things, such as chapstick, headphones, hand sanitizer, and hair pins/ties. Those are the more obvious items to have in a purse, along with pocket tissues (the blue thing with a bee on it), little baggy pharmaceutical station (where I keep all my aspirins and allergy medicine), and external battery (the teal and pink bar next to the pink baggy with the wires for the external battery, which I never charge so it’s kind of just dead weight). These are the things I usually keep in my purse. The traveling has brought in the sunscreen, the bag of peanuts in case I’m hungry, the little polka dot bag that has my tampons in it (as to attempt to be discreet as I rush off to the bathroom with little bag in hand), jewelry to wear at my grandma’s memorial, and the black tights all rolled up (ready to help out in a leg emergency). In the bottom left corner there’s all the things I acquired during her memorial (yes, that is a bottle of her. Alongside it are pamphlets from the memorial, pens she used to buy from a catalog and send out to all the relatives, and little trinkets she used to collect from the shore).

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On the right there is my hotel room key, a camera I haven’t used this entire trip (despite charging it and prepping it before I came), a couple of napkins, sunglasses, a massive water bottle (I like to stay hydrated), a notebook with a fancy pen that Chelsea made fun of me for buying, and my kindle. Normally there would have been a lot more garbage at the bottom of my bag and random change, butĀ that’s been cleared out before I went on the move. If I were to assess my personality from looking at the insides of my bag, I would think I’m a paranoid person that feels the need to prepare for anything haha.

I hope you enjoy this purse-tourĀ at least a fraction of the amount in which I enjoyed yours. I also hope your week has been lovely miss Chelso Mow and I look forward to your next post! When I return there will be a punishment that I will attend to.

Let Me Tell You A Poorly Told Story

dancing chelso

There once was a beautiful, courageous and cunning gal named Chelsea who befriended a ridiculous person named Maryanne. Through this friendship Chelsea changed Maryanne’s worldview and let her run wild. She even offered to let her sit in the desert to stare and feel some sort of life fulfillment out of it.

Chelsea lived, heart filled with glory, wielding incomprehensible skills in crafting the perfect gluten-less apple pie. Much like her apple pie, her words were full of flavor and struck you to your soul. So she marched forth, taking out problems one by one with her random pockets of knowledge and fierce humor.

In conclusion, Chelsea stole all of our hearts in one way or another. (The End)

Chelsea you’re wonderful, this was my attempt to describe the ways in which you are. You are one of the funniest people I’ve ever met, with some of the best one-liners I’ve ever heard. I won’t even bother trying to put any of them into words because I would paraphrase them into garbage.

You’re brave and talented and protective of the people you love. And I think you’re awesome for always expressing how you feel about something. You are always able to cut through the chaos and crap of a situation, and I cannot count the times that I am envious of your clarity in which you see the world.

I’m lucky to know someone like you! Also sorry for the short post. I look forward to seeing your post this week!